Several years ago, I had a new leader join the HR team. In our first meeting, he sat us down for a super-casual, get-to-know-him talk. He gave us his background and bio, and when he got to why he was hired to lead our team, he said, "I was brought in to blow shit up." He then proceeded to tell us how he would blow said shit up and what his vision for the future was. I pulled him aside a few days after the meeting and told him, gently, that we had built all the shit he was

A colleague of mine was trying to decide whether or not to take a new job. There were lots of pros and a couple of major cons, and she was really struggling with her decision. She came to me because her boyfriend had told her to "trust her gut" and, while she knew what that meant (sort of), she didn't believe that her gut would ultimately lead her in the right direction -- it was weak, she argued, and would go for what was comfortable. I encouraged her to break the whole d

Last week, I had a day that was packed to the gills with meetings and each one had something I needed to produce as a result. That night I had to travel to a training location, and the following two days I was in all-day sessions, and I wouldn't be able to get to my computer until night time. When I put my kids to bed. So I was feeling stressed. Which was actually great, because it gave me an opportunity to use a tool I teach for helping manage stress: the ABCs of Stress.

Remember that New Year's resolution you made? How well are you maintaining the necessary boundaries around your time, money, or energy to keep making progress? I've noticed in both my coaching and facilitating work that so many people - leaders and employees alike - are struggling to maintain healthy boundaries. Whether that's a physical boundary (like the vendor who sits too close) or, more often, a time boundary (never leaving at 6, even though you've promised your part

As I mentioned in my recent newsletter (which you are welcome to sign up for here ), many people take time in December to reflect and prepare for the coming new year. Others are crunched with year-end requests, closing the books, or preparing for the onslaught of family visits. Whether you reflect in December or some other time of the year doesn't really make a difference - what matters is that you take the time to look back and find patterns, habits, and, ideally, motivat

The other day, I did some momming worthy of the Golden Globe for Best Parenting in a Comedy Series. My daughter had done something kind of stupid and impulsive and was mortified by her own behavior. My husband and I agreed that punishing her for what she did would just compound her embarrassment and shame, and so we decided to help her process her feelings instead. (And, of course, there was no screen time.) In that moment of parenting, I was intensely focused on the prese

For the last year, every day at around 1pm, I would get a small visitor in my office. "Mommy," she would say, "can you have lunch with...

When was the last time something came along and fundamentally changed the way you thought about things? Give that question a minute - we...

In my last post, Meet Five of Your Accomplice Saboteurs , you were introduced to The Avoider, The Controller, and the three Hypers:...

In last week's post, The Judge in Your Head , I talked about the universal Saboteur that afflicts us all, the Judge. The Judge spends...

I woke up the other morning and my daughter was sick, which meant she was staying home from school. I work from home and had a four-hour...

Earlier this year I was in the hospital for a week with a double ear infection and meningitis. (If you're offered the opportunity to do...

Imagine you're about to give some unpleasant critical feedback to someone who is definitely going to have a hard time taking it. What's...

In a world filled with constant change, the way you approach new opportunities can make all the difference. Your mindset impacts the way...

It's becoming increasingly more apparent that HR teams are facing challenges that other teams just don't face -- challenges that are more...

My fellow coach, Ian Lopez, has contributed this fantastic post -- check him out at www.cambioleadership.com As adults, we have the...

In keeping with the theme I've been working on lately, this post about Mental Boundaries will be somewhat similar to my previous posts on Physical Boundaries , Conversational Boundaries , Material Boundaries , Time Boundaries , and Emotional Boundaries in that it outlines what Mental Boundaries are, what it looks like when they're violated, and how you might stand up for your boundary going forward. Mental Boundaries – To have your own thoughts, values, opinions, ideas, and

If you're just tuning into this series, you might want to check out my previous posts on Physical Boundaries , Conversational Boundaries , and Material Boundaries , each of which covers the things you put in place to protect your body, your ears (and triggers), and your stuff. In this post, we'll be looking at one of the most important boundaries that exist for both work and life, time boundaries. Time Boundaries – To protect the use and misuse of your time Time boundaries t

In Seven Types of Boundaries at Work , we looked at the seven different kinds of boundaries you may need at work (good title, no?) and what physical boundaries are, and how to enforce them. Then, in Conversational Boundaries , we looked at what you can do when people repeatedly talk about things that make you uncomfortable. Today we'll dig into another kind of boundary you might experience at work, depending on what you do and where you do it -- material boundaries. Material

Part of what I love about coaching is discovering and understanding different people's beliefs about the world around them, and how they view the mysterious and unknowable spaces associated with it. Some people call these spaces "god" or "a higher power," some "the universe," and some talk about it as the interconnectedness of humanity. (And some haven't given it a thought until we've talked.) Whatever you call it, I'm talking about the energy that is outside yourself, not