The Leadership Superpower of Changing Your Mind

Somewhere in our leadership journeys, many of us picked up the idea that good leaders are confident, have answers, make decisions, and stand by those decisions.  And while doing those things can be great, there’s a leadership skill that runs alongside them and is often overlooked:  The ability to change your mind.

I’m not talking about flip-flopping or caving under pressure.  I’m talking about changing your mind because you learned something new.

I’ll say this first: If you’re afraid of being wrong, leadership may not be for you. Even the best leaders will be wrong. (It's inevitable.)  You make decisions with incomplete information, interpret situations based on what you know at the time, and make assumptions about people, projects, timelines, risks, and priorities.  Sometimes those assumptions turn out to be wrong.

However, the problem isn't being wrong.  It’s becoming so invested in being right that you can't admit it.  When you refuse to reconsider a decision simply because you’ve already announced it, the follow-on cost can be high. Your people stop bringing forward information that challenges your perspective. Bad ideas stay alive longer than they should. Your team learns that agreement is safer than honesty.  And eventually, people stop saying, "I think we're headed in the wrong direction"; they just eat a bag of chips while they watch it happen.

Changing Your Mind Isn't the Same as Being Indecisive

There's an important difference between indecision and adaptability.  Indecision is wishy-washy, insecure, and waiting for someone else to weigh in.  It often sounds like, "I don't know. What do you think? Maybe we should wait. Let's talk about it again next week." 

But adaptability is intentionally pivoting when new information makes the previous choice less optional.  It sounds like, "Based on what we know now, I would make a different decision."

One avoids making a decision, and the other makes a decision and remains willing to learn.  No one expects you to get every decision right the first time. You do, however, need to be willing to adjust when the evidence changes.

Your Team Is Watching What Happens When You're Wrong

Think about the message you send when you say, "I initially thought X, but I've heard your concerns and looked at the new information. I was wrong. We're going to change course."  It’s modeling for your team how to keep up with current information.  You're showing your team that new information matters, speaking up is safe, changing course is acceptable, and you don’t have to defend a bad decision just to maintain status.

Now compare that with a leader who says, "We've already decided. We're not going back."  Sometimes that is exactly the right response – you shouldn't reverse a decision simply because someone disagrees.  But if the real reason for staying the course is "I don't want to look like I was wrong," that's a very different situation.

Make It Safe to Change Your Mind

One of the best things a leader can do is normalize changing course.  Try saying things like:

• "Here's what I think based on what we know today."  The addition of “based on what we know today” leaves room for new information.

• "What am I missing?" is an invitation for people to challenge your thinking (and one of my favorite open-ended questions).  And when someone does bring you something that changes your perspective, acknowledge it.

• "I hadn't considered that," "You're right. That changes my thinking," or "I was making an assumption that doesn't appear to be accurate."  These kinds of statements don't diminish your authority; they make your authority more credible.

The Goal Isn't to Be Right

I once had a friend who got very attached to being right, even if what she was attached to was bad news.  “All the guys I meet are pigs,” she used to say, and, in fairness, she did date some duds.  But when a nice guy came along, she’d scrutinize him so much and find enough flaws to label him a pig, too.  At one point I asked her, “Would you rather be right about your judgment of men, or find one you can fall in love with?”  (Her response?  “BUT I AM RIGHT!”)

Leadership isn't a contest to see who can be right most often; it's about helping a group move toward the best possible outcome.  Sometimes that means holding your ground, and sometimes it means changing your mind.  The strongest leaders aren't necessarily the ones who make the fewest mistakes.  They're the ones who are secure enough to be wrong, curious enough to learn, and humble enough to change course.

So the next time you find yourself defending a position, pause and ask yourself:  Am I defending this because it's still the best decision, or because I don't want to admit I was wrong?  That answer might tell you more about your leadership than the decision itself.